When Things Fall Through: Why It’s Time to Listen and Align | Blog
When Life Says No…
This past week, three things I was excited about fell through. Two had financial implications. The third seemed like the perfect answer to a problem I’d been wrestling with for months.
It’s probably no surprise that I had a mix of reactions.
In each case, I felt a surprising sense of okayness — a knowing that things had landed exactly as they should. But that didn’t stop the other reactions from showing up.
Disappointment. Questioning. A swirl of what-ifs—could I have done something differently? Was I missing something? My mind kicked into high gear, working overtime to fill the gaps these losses left behind.
That high gear sent me straight into problem-solving mode—urgent and on a mission to get answers. My mind was off to the races, with some starts and stops, and a few rabbit holes. And that’s just in the first five minutes. 😉 Ok, that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but you get my point.
To be fair — some of those rabbit holes felt productive. I mean, at least I was doing something, which, in the moment, felt good. But soon, I could feel it—this dull sense of familiarity. The weight of effort without real alignment. The energy of trying instead of seeing.
It hit me: I was building a strategy from reactivity, from fear, from worry. The urgency I felt should have been my first red flag, but boy, is it compelling!
When I stopped leaning into that urgency, when my mind got quiet again, I saw something I had completely missed. The paths I had been chasing weren’t fruitful — they weren’t even interesting to me anymore. They were old. Yesterday’s wisdom.
I’m bored even thinking about them now.
I’m incredibly grateful for the understanding that allows me to be fully human—afraid and reactive—while also knowing that none of it is permanent. As those reactions pass, wisdom is right there, waiting for me.
So, what was wisdom revealing to me in that moment?
Life has a way of pointing us and guiding us — if we allow it. That things falling away aren’t always a problem to fix. Sometimes, they’re an invitation to listen.
What if the things that don’t work out—the ones that slip through our fingers no matter how hard we try—aren’t proof that we’re failing? What if they’re offering us a deeper, more honest opportunity to listen?
To listen to what is alive right now. To trust. To move in the direction of what is truly aligned rather than what is merely familiar.
To hear and feel what’s alive, we often have to soften our grip on what we think we know. On our search for the “right” thing. On our preferences, expectations, and preconceived notions of how it’s supposed to go.
I know, from experience, that this is easier said than done. Many of us have been conditioned to believe that the answer lies in doing—figuring it out, pushing forward, making it happen.
But what if life is offering us something deeper?
What if we are being invited into a more expansive way of being and working — one where we don’t have to try so hard, where life itself is leading us, moment by moment?
Instead of chasing answers, we become still enough to hear the call that is rising within.
What’s alive, what wants to be seen, isn’t behind us or ahead of us—it’s here, woven into this very moment.
And when we listen, we catch the spark. A nudge, a curiosity.
When we follow those nudges, we step into life as it is, rather than trying to force it into what we think it should be. And in doing so, we get more information. More possibilities open up. We move from alignment rather than effort.
And from there, the way emerges.
This past week, when I finally got still and listened, I could see the perfection of what had fallen away. In its place, something new started to arise. I started writing, shaping, and allowing what was alive to be expressed. I felt the energy shift. The more I played with it, the more it took shape.
Suddenly, I could feel the difference between what I had been chasing—the smart thing, the safe thing, the thing that usually works — and what it means to let something truly alive come to life.
Am I certain it will take off? No. Do I know it will make me money? No. Do I know for sure I won’t stumble? No.
But here’s what I do know: I am ready to follow what’s alive.
To let life lead me. To trust that what is unfolding is not random but deeply resonates. To move toward what calls me, rather than defaulting to what feels “safer.”
More to come on these new expressions and adventures. But for now, I have a question for you:
What shifts when you begin to see that life is happening for you, not to you?
When you slow down and listen more deeply — what do you hear?
What’s alive and wanting to be expressed through you?
“What if the things that don’t work out—the ones that slip through our fingers no matter how hard we try—aren’t proof that we’re failing but offer us a deeper, more honest opportunity to listen?”
Would you like to experience new possibilities in your business or leadership? Would you like to move beyond the limitations of the mind to find new expressions and results? If so, one-on-one mentoring may be a perfect fit. If you’d like to have an exploratory conversation, email me at barb@barbarapatterson.com.
