What If We Don’t Have “Issues” | Video
What If We Don’t Have “Issues” | Video
Earlier this year I was working with a client over a 4-day intensive. On the third day, she started sharing about her mother. As she shared about her mother and her childhood, she became emotional. Then she said, “I have a self-worth issue”.
What struck me, was not the fact that she had feelings about some of her past hurts and disappointments. We all do. Not the fact that when she shared those stories her feelings plummeted. That's how it works. We feel our thinking.
As I listened, I immediately had compassion and understanding while at the same time I was struck by the fact that in our time together over the last few days, this was the first time that she brought up the idea that she had a self-worth issue. In fact, while we had spent the last two days talking about her life, her business and all the challenges, never once had she talked about this.
Now this might sound strange, but I asked her, “Did you have a self-worth issue 5 minutes ago?”
As she looked at me with a confused expression, I could also see she got reflective.
You see, the last two days we had been exploring how all humans can only feel the thinking they are having in the moment.
Our experience of our lives, our businesses and even ourselves is being shaped by what's going on in our minds…in that moment.
In fact, it's momentary. It's fluid. It does not have roots, or legs or substance.
This simple yet powerful understanding has been a game changer for me.
I’ve had a long history of over identifying with all my ideas about myself and all the conclusions and labels I had made up about me. By over identifying with them, they looked like something I had to overcome or deal with.
But when I began my own personal exploration into understanding our innate nature and the role of thought in shaping our reality I learned three things that have had huge implications.
Our current experience of ourselves and life is a reflection of what's going on in our minds via thought in that moment.
Thought is fluid. It's transient. It does not have roots. Which means every experience is fluid too.
Beyond our momentary experience, there is a powerful and innate potential of our minds that allows people to have fresh thought, aha moments, insights, shifts in consciousness and therefore have a whole new experience of who they are and what's possible for them.
What does this have to do with self-worth?
In the story above, self-worth was not a thing, it wasn't a problem, it wasn't even in her reality until she started thinking about it. She wasn't having to overcome anything 5 minutes earlier. It was only in her reality when it came through via thought.
Only when we identify with our ideas, our thinking, do they look like something other than fleeting thoughts. But there is incredible freedom and new depth; a new richness available to us when we let go of all the ideas we have about our faults, our issues or who we think we are.
We fall into a NEW KNOWING of our TRUE NATURE.
From that space, we experience a whole new “carefreeness” within ourselves.
As this client started to consider that there is no such thing as issues – just thought in a moment – she got a huge smile on her face. A knew “knowing” – a new truth started to rise up in her. She saw that she did not have to argue for her limitation.
She saw with a new simplicity that all that had been happening is she had been over identifying with thought, therefore keeping the concept of low self-worth alive.
As soon as she SAW this, she also began to SEE all the ways she was doing really well. The complete opposite of dealing with a self-worth issue.
This story illustrates how our version of us, our current reality of who we think we are is even up for grabs. Meaning, it's fluid. It's shaped by thought. We are designed to have fresh thinking which means – fresh thinking about us too.
In this week's video, I share more about how this has played out in my own life and invite us all to look beyond our ideas of who we are and experience a deeper truth
“We are designed to have fresh thinking which means – fresh thinking about us too.”
SEEING that there is more to us than our thoughts, our personalities, our behaviors and our history wakes us up to a whole new feeling of freedom, love and new potential.
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Barbara Patterson is the owner of a global coaching and consulting company helping solopreneurs, entrepreneurs & leaders access more clarity, creativity, have greater impact and higher levels of fulfillment in work and life. She is the founder of Beyond Limits in Business, a global platform and community designed to point people to the source of human potential. That potential resides within and is experienced via our minds. If you’d like to experience in-depth, robust and transformative mentoring for you and your business check out Barb’s 4-month virtual Beyond Limits Small Group Mentoring Program. Barb is also the host of the Real Business Real Lives podcast. You can follow Barb on Linkedin, Twitter and Insta