You Got This | Blog - Barbara Patterson

You Got This | Blog

You Got This

Over the last few months I have had the phrase, “You got this,” or “You can handle it” on my mind a lot. I’ve been saying one version or another of those words to myself, my clients or the people in my life every day.

During this time of accelerated shifts, change and awakening, the proverbial rug has been pulled out from under us. For many, our worlds look nothing like they did four months ago. For many we are not the same person we were four months ago.

As we’ve been thrown into the unknown with COVID or have been waking up to blind spots, new realizations and an uprising since the death of George Floyd, we have had to find our courage to stay the course or begin again and again. We’ve had to go within to find our strength, our wellbeing and our resilience.

While uncomfortable and destabilizing at times, we’ve been finding our way. We’ve been discovering we have what it takes and on the other side of that discomfort has been new insight, creativity, opportunity and growth. On the other side has been new experiences, expansion, connection and love.

Have you avoided anything because it just feels too hard? Have you wanted to stop because it feels uncomfortable? What if you knew you could handle it? You can handle the discomfort of growth; of change. You can handle really looking and listening. You can handle an uncomfortable conversation or trying something new.

What if you knew you were stronger than you think?

Sometimes I find where we need the courage most is not in the big events or big changes but in those quieter, internal ones. The everyday moments when we run from something because it’s uncomfortable.

For instance, you want to share yourself, your feelings, your perspective with someone but you feel self-conscious, nervous or vulnerable, so you don’t. You want to try something new or that “thing” you’ve always wanted to do, but you don’t want to look like a fool or get it wrong and it remains an idea and never comes into form.

We can stop ourselves from experiencing more of the fullness of who we are because it feels uncomfortable. We stop our own growth and expansion because it feels uncomfortable. We don’t say the hard things because it feels uncomfortable. We don’t do the inner work, we don’t quiet down enough inside to listen, really listen because we’re afraid or avoiding the uncomfortable feelings. We don’t listen to another person and take in what they are saying because it makes us uncomfortable. 

Without realizing it, we start to treat ourselves like we are fragile. 

We are strengthened by moving towards those moments. By hanging in there or riding it out. When we understand that beneath the unease and discomfort is our stability, we see that we have what it takes. 

Our reflex might be to run from, avoid, pull back or hesitate but if we can learn to lean into those moments, we make new discoveries about ourselves and we tap into our inherent strength, well-being and resilience. 

I can think of many instances where I avoided those discomforts. Or I tried to sort it all out in my mind first. I would postpone, put things off or not engage at all because I couldn’t seem to get past my self-consciousness. I might avoid the hard thing even though I knew it was the right thing. 

I’ve been incredibly grateful over these last few weeks in particular to discover that when I put my desire to see, to hear, to connect above the need to protect, to guard myself or be careful, I’ve felt more alive and have seen even more clearly, that we can do this. 

We have what it takes to learn, grow and connect. 

When we switch from trying to take the discomfort away and learn to be with it, we see the fluid nature of it. We see our discomfort and fear does not have roots. And as it moves through us, we experience our well-being, our wholeness. 

We become more confident. Not in circumstance or life or a certain outcome, but in our own ability to handle the discomfort. We see that our being, our essence, is not fragile. 

When we realize wisdom, insight, creativity, resilience and well-being reside within, we realize that all we need is right where we are.

It is why no matter what is happening, what is opening up in you or where you are drawn to learn more & take more risks, you can say, with certainty, “I got this”. 

We don’t know the outcome and we know the ride may feel like a roller coaster. But just like the roller coaster we are locked in. We are ultimately safe. Our safety is not in our feelings or in the circumstance, our safety is within. In our innate nature. Our innate well-being and resilience. It has been helping us rise to the occasion our whole lives. 

On the other side of discomfort is a fresh experience of your own potential; new depth and intimacy in your relationships. We reveal ourselves to ourselves. A “new you” emerges or perhaps the more truthful way to say that is, a “you” that has always been there. 

As you move through these times and through your life, what would you do, what would you say to someone, what would you try if you knew you could handle it?

“On the other side of discomfort is a fresh experience of your own potential; new depth and intimacy in your relationships.”

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” 
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Barbara Patterson is the owner of a global coaching and consulting company helping solopreneurs, entrepreneurs & leaders access more clarity, creativity, have greater impact and higher levels of fulfillment in work and life. She is the founder of Beyond Limits in Business, a global platform and community designed to point people to the source of human potential. That potential resides within and is experienced via our minds. If you’d like to experience in-depth, robust and transformative mentoring for you and your business check out Barb’s 4-month virtual Beyond Limits Small Group Mentoring ProgramBarb is also the host of the Real Business Real Lives podcast. You can follow Barb on LinkedinTwitter and Instagram. You can also subscribe to her weekly blog on her website at barbarapatterson.com 

 

 

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